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Alt  26.11.2003, 21:16   # 1
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Thumbs down [Austria] - Hands OFF Club Touch in Kufstein

My dearest friends, was last week in Innsbruck and ended up in a nearby town (KuClub TOUCH!

Thursday night 20:30
Pay 50 Euro for entrance
All girls sitting on a couch JUMP up as they see me arrive as if they were all sleeping and got an electric shock up their butt to go to work
Visit the club with some russian broad (Cindy)
Club looks good .... small talk on a couch with Cindy ...
Food: only COLD dishes (salami and wurst, not very appetizing)
Drink: 45 Euro for 1 piccolo

Room: get the jacuzzi room (russian room) 1 HOUR
Cindy cleans the Jacuzzi for 10 minutes (clock is ticking)
Take shower, me first, while she is cleaning.
She joins me to bed, puts watch close to the pillow and checks EVERY 30 sec the time.
Says: if you want i can sty longer than one hour (NO WAY !! baby)
Sucks dick without condom, the fuck: 3 positions. I come once, she fakes once (the worse fake I have ever heard)
Jacuzzi with second piccolo (45 euro)
Jacuzzi BROKEN .... sorry I did not know that ....says Cindy (after having scraped the damned thing for 10 minutes of MY hour)

Still have 13 min and 27.4 seconds. I ask "massage my back?" she says "no we have to be downstairs by the end of the hour"
On the way down she wispers:
" i forgot to tell you: you have to say you were very happy when they ask ..." DREAM ON !!!! Russian bitch

Well, my friends,
paid 390 euro for 20 minutes fuck. No refund for broken jacuzzi (what was I thinking when I asked .... )
On the way back to Innsbruck got clocked by the cops at 146 Km/h: 105 euro ... The nightmare was then over.

What a terrible night!

If you still want to try it GOOD LUCK !!!

P.S.
The next day drove by the Ice rink: nice blondy, nice tits, one good blowjob: 60 euro. If I only knew ....
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Alt  28.09.2006, 22:34   # 11
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@ zh8001

as i spend some years in black-africa...so read this with nigerian dialect, so i wrote slowly...i know...many of you cunt read that fast....

an old husband from switzerland invites his old wife to a london trip
in the taxi from luton to the hotel the taxi driver asks

where are you from???

as the old girl doenst understand english, her husband translates and responds to the taxidriver in english...

well...we are from switzerrländ...

taxler: oh, what citiy???

the wife:?????

the husband translates again and responds to the taxidriver:

we are frrom baaasel

the taxidriver: aaaahhh basel...in this city...i have got the worst fuck in my life....

the wife: what did he say???

the husband in swiss (but english for the aliens here...): he knows you...

so long
netlover
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Alt  16.09.2006, 20:20   # 10
katanka
 
Mitglied seit 15.12.2004

Beiträge: 43


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How to learn English

@ tirolroland

There is a very helpful book to brush up your English: Englisch aber richtig (around 20 euros), cheaper at ebay, occasionally. I profited a lot from it. Moreover, it is easy to understand and even funny, sometimes.
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Alt  20.01.2004, 19:24   # 9
derwisch
liebt das Besondere
 
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derwisch ist offline
good story and it sounds very different but it sounds very honest! I was once in this club and it wasn't so successful..... I was happy to find (just before leaving) the right girl at it was very good...... she worked before at Babylon and I saw the blonde girl 6 months later behind the reception at Casa!!
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Alt  20.01.2004, 02:36   # 8
trexinside
Spielkamerad
 
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@red wolf
Everything is different to Austrian schools
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Alt  20.01.2004, 02:31   # 7
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@ strammermaxe:

That's "happened", not "happend" - or do they spell it different in London than in Austrian schools and in Liverpool?
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Alt  28.11.2003, 12:28   # 6
strammermaxe
242
 
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@tirolroland

I happend to share an excellent education at Central St. Martin's College, London. Moreover some years in Oxford provided me a little knowledge about this language.

Sorry for you, wanker ;-)
__________________
... die zukunft ist auch nicht mehr das, was sie einmal war ...
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Alt  28.11.2003, 07:33   # 5
tirolroland
Insider
 
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touch

wo habt ihr denn so gut englisch gelernt ihr idioten ???
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Alt  27.11.2003, 18:39   # 4
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thx a lot for the warning... I was about to give it a try...
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Alt  27.11.2003, 10:55   # 3
strammermaxe
242
 
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such a shame

unbelievable, sorry, but I had to lol while reading your story. jacuzzi broken ... what the fuck did you do with it? please keep on writing more of such articles ;-)
__________________
... die zukunft ist auch nicht mehr das, was sie einmal war ...
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Alt  27.11.2003, 10:49   # 2
uHund
Wadlbeiss
 
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@ zh

Thanks for the warning. I am afraid, however, that you joined this dirty game too long. Most of the users here stop the whole thing before paying the FIRST drink.
__________________
Es grüßt euch euer alter Sauschwanz Rosenkranz
(Mozarts Signatur)
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